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Computer Programmer
Los Angeles, CA


Born and raised in Ojai, California, Christa Hastie currently lives in Los Angeles and is engaged to be married to a racecar driver. She is employed as a computer programmer. As a child, she worked as a model requiring her to travel to Tokyo and the Bahamas. During high school and college, she worked as a lifeguard for four years.

She is most proud of earning a Bachelor of Arts degree from the University of California, Irvine, although she believes her real education comes from living life and diving into any and all opportunities. Her favorite hobbies include creating and designing websites, software and database applications, turning wrenches on her fiancÚ's race car and sewing fun and unique clothes.

She describes herself as chameleon-like (she claims she can fit in anywhere), extroverted and genuine. She is a member of the Sports Car Club of America so she can be a member of her fiancÚ's pit crew when he races. She considers her late father to be her hero as he taught her that the most important things in life were to love, laugh and live.

She was once arrested for a misdemeanor and charged with "disrupting an officer's ability to perform his duties." While in college, she hopped on her car and refused to get off the hood when she discovered it was in the process of being towed.

She believes she's an asset to her tribe on SURVIVOR: PEARL ISLANDS because her food making skills will prove helpful to her tribe. Her birth date is November 6, 1978.

Photo, Biography, and Favorites courtesy CBS



Colors: Pink, tan
Scents: Gardenia, rose
Flowers: Daisy
Board Games: Scrabble, Clue, Guess Who?
Video Games: Monkeyball, Zelda, Mario Brothers
Sports to Play: Tennis, football, kickboxing, boxing, swimming, softball
Sports Teams: Lakers
Outdoor Activities: Rock hounding, hiking, surfing, snowboarding, 4X4ing
TV Shows: SURVIVOR, THE AMAZING RACE, HGTV House Hunters, Designer's Challenge
Movies: Bowfinger; O Brother, Where Art Thou?, Lord of the Rings, Fight Club
Actors: Edward Norton
Actresses: Lucille Ball
Music: Ben Harper, David Gray, Ryan Adams, Rolling Stones, Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin
Magazines: Information Architect, Martha Stewart Living, Entrepreneur
Books/Authors: Washington on $10 Million Dollars a Day by Ken Silverstein, Thus Spake Zarathustra by Friedrich Nietzsche
Cereals: Grape Nuts, Raisin Bran
Fruits: California navel orange, grapefruit, raspberries
Snack Foods: Tiger's Milk bars, dried apricots
Cookies: Chocolate chip
Candy Bars: Twix
Alcoholic Drinks: Singapore sling, vodka Collins
Non-Alcoholic: Tangerine-grapefruit juice, Coke


Photos courtesy Survivor Phoenix

Let us discuss Christa Hastie

(My little disclaimer: As with all Survivor profiles, I am totally making all this stuff up as if I actually have a clue. I do not in any way know any of these survivors. However, I've received many emails from past Survivors complimenting me on my insight. So, although I make this crap up, sometimes I'm actually right.)

Christa is the California Cutie. Just look at her. Isn't she adorable? I have even copied the CBS picture down here so we can look at her some more. Isn't she just the cutest thing? Not only that, but she was a model as a child and has even been a lifeguard. Woo-eee. I just can't get enough of her. Man-oh-man.

:: sigh ::

Woo-ee again!

Boy, she sure is somethin'.

Just look at that smile and her pretty blonde hair.

Woo Woo!



Now that we've established that she's attractive, what else can I say about Christa?



Let's see... I'm sure I can think of something.


Hold on...

It's coming to me...


Real soon, now...


Dang-it. It's just not happening.

And it seems as though even Christa has the same problem. She was given one paragraph to define who she is and what she's done in her life. She could say anything, mention any accomplishment, any skill, any talents and interests that she may have.

But in this very limited space dedicated to HER, what does she mention?

Well, she mentions her race car driver fiance. Several times. In the very paragraph that she was given to define WHO SHE IS. Then she shares with us the little story about how she hopped on the hood of her car and refused to allow it to be towed and got charged with a misdemeanor.

I wonder if her fiance's name is Jerry... because Primus has a song called Jerry is a Race Car Driver and it's pure funkalicious beautitude. In fact, the whole CD Sailing the Seas of Cheese is simply a splended thing, especially the song Tommy the Cat. I just LOVE that song.

I've tried getting my band to play this but the bass player can't play what Les Claypool does. He is awesome, even though he can't sing worth a crap. But what's really cool is Primus' bass player, Les Claypool, formed a band with Police drummer Stewart Copeland and Trey Anastasio from Phish. I think it was called Oysterhead. Their stuff was incredible.

You know what I think would be cool? I'd like to hear an awesome singer, someone like Celine Dion who has just an incredible voice but sings super crap music, play with a jazz-fusion drummer, a screamin' metal-head guitarist, and a funky-as-all-get-out bass player. What a mix that would be!

That would be like, well you know how when you're mixing chocolate chip cookies and initially you throw the sugar and the butter in. Work that up real nice, then the eggs and the flour. But the flour sort of just does its own thing for a while, never quite blending in and then just as you're about to go and buy one of those wimp-ass sausage-like rolls of frozen cookie dough, something happens and the flour mixes in. You rejoice, add the chips and then before you know it, hot, fresh-baked, chocolate-chips-melting-on-your-fingers cookies are soon sliding down your happy throat, calories and excess carbohydrates be damned.

Now THERE is...








What was I talking about ?


Wasn't that creative? I described Christa without really saying anything about her.

But I thought I should add that Christa does seem to have a bit of a past when it comes to seeking out drugs online. Check out this Smoking Gun page:

It also shows that maybe she might be a few sandwiches short of a picnic.


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