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LetusPonder Columns

10/18/05 The Ten Commandments - What They SHOULD Be

12/27 Do You REALLY Want World Peace?

10/15 Support Ribbon Overload Awareness

7/18 The Ultimate Guide to Kissing - Part 2: The First Kiss
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7/7 Part 1: The Bad Ways to Kiss
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4/19 Do You Truly
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3/1 Which Drunk are You?


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LetusPonder Column:

Support Ribbon Overload Awareness

- Rob Daugherty

Ribbons, ribbons, and more ribbons. Everywhere I drive I see ribbons; Breast Cancer Awareness, Support Our Troops, Remember the 9/11 Victims, Leimyosarcoma

Awareness. Rarely do I pull up behind a car and not see some sort of appendage suggesting that I remember something, support something, sympathize, donate, pray, appreciate, protest, feed, don't eat, don't kill, vote, don't vote...

I like what they represent. I like that they are trying to help. I like that they care. But Geez-Louise...

I am so tired of the ribbon thing.

People have done to the ribbons what radio stations do to good songs. Overkill. Initially it was a good thing, but now it's just become annoying. Almost every car has at least one ribbon, sometimes three or four.

The problem with this is because they are far too common, the meaning and the original intent is forgotten. I no longer sympathize and actually consider donating to the Male Breast Cancer Fund (that's the Pastel Pink and Blue ribbon). Instead, I try to remember (or somehow read the small print) what the hell that Purple Ribbon with a Red Rose (Cystic Fibrosis) and the Navy Blue and White Pinstripe (Lou Gehrig's Disease) ribbons are all about.

I no longer think, "Hey, I should donate my time or some money to this cause." Instead, I find myself critiquing the ribbon designs, wondering why the hell Periwinkle was chosen to represent eating disorders. (Note: Periwinkle is also the Pulmonary Hypertension Awareness ribbon color.)

So enough with the ribbons already. I've stopped noticing their messages. There now has to be something else to capture my attention and move me to act, something other than the concern for, say, Testicular Cancer (Orchid/Violet ribbon).

But enough moaning and groaning. I was once told never to bring up a problem unless I have a solution. Here's my solution:

One HUGE white ribbon, about six- to eight-feet long with every organization's phrase and logo listed. It can be attached to the top of the car with those huge suction cup thingies diamond thieves use to crawl up the sides of buildings in the movies.

This way, people will know that you REALLY care about everyone and everything, that you intend to remember everything, feed everyone, support all causes, and be aware of all things.

But I already see a problem with this. I suggested WHITE because some graphic artists will tell you white is the combination of all colors. But white is already used for several causes. Someone would look over at your monstrous white ribbon and think, "Wow, this person REALLY supports Victims Of Terrorism, Peace, Right To Life, Innocence, Diabetes, Retinal Blastoma, Alzheimers, or Gay-Teen Suicide Awareness."

And thus, after exploring the net and finding as many ribbons and causes one could find in a diligent 10-minute search, it's clear that, in order to be unique, my ribbon must contain the following characteristics:

Polka-dots, glitter, a starburst or two, wood-grained texture, faux fur edges, and a few of those jingle-bell doo-wackies high school girls wear in their shoelaces during Christmas-time. And maybe it could be tied into a bow.

Most importantly, however and I apologize for my redundancy, but this is something I feel very strongly about is that this ribbon MUST be at least six- to eight-feet large.

So, please...

Show your support and your concern and your awareness of all things and place your monstrous ribbon on your car today! The world WILL be a better place if you do.

Thank you for caring.


For your information, here are the two sites that had the most comprehensive ribbon/color explanations:

http://www.personalizedcause.com/index.html
http://www.craftsnscraps.com/jewelry/ribbons.html

 


And on a personal note I may kid around, but if you see a cause that is important to you, donate some money, donate your time, do SOMETHING other than nodding your head and talking about it. A lot of people, a lot of things, really do need your help.

 


 

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