opens with Tribe Idiot crying about how "it's very hard
to freeze every night." Within the first minute, we see
the theme of this episode:
Osten turns into a wimp-ass and tries to make excuses so that
he no longer has to be cold at night and so that he can return
home to his buddies and his comfy bed with the nice comforter
and soft pillows that he snuggles up to with no fear of dreadful
wild animals and snakes suddenly eating off his leg. "To
me," he says, "it seems like only a matter of time
before, you know, something like pneumonia or something like
that could settle in because I don't have any clothes."
analyze this statement:
me... I said 'To me' because I'm pretty dang sure the other 15
people had a clue as to what SURVIVOR means, while I, on the
other hand, was expecting only to tan, build sand castles,
and compete in those challenges where my big muscles really
it seems like only a matter of time before,... I want this over now
you know,... I'm looking for a little affirmation here, a little support
for my wimp-ass self
something like pneumonia or something like that could settle
in... I once read that when people, you know, are really cold
at night and they shiver and shake because they were idiots
and decided to get rid of all their clothes due to an impulsive
action, that they all get sick from pneumonia and even though
there are doctors around watching my every move and even though
I'm not a professional athlete nor anything else that entirely
depends on a perfectly healthy body to earn a living, I think
that maybe I should insist that my wimp-ass self is quite
likely going to die if I have to shiver for a few more nights,
although it's only ME and not anyone else that this could
possibly happen to, and thus I'm thinking I should maybe get
off this miserable vacation resort island as soon as possible...
because I don't have any clothes." since I gave them away like a dolt with zero foresight.
so, throughout the show, we hear him cry and whine and even
tell people to vote him out. He's probably telling people
now that this was all strategy, something he did to make him
seem like he wasn't such a threat or that it was some master
plan to eliminate Skinny Ryan.
all know the truth, don't we? Osten is a wimp-ass.
admit, though, that I, too, would be a total wimp-ass. I'd
be bitchin' and moaning the entire time. This, of course,
assumes that I would also be a dolt and give away all my clothes
and then not really try, at all costs, to fashion some sort
of shelter from the night wind.
those super-popular Where's Waldo? Books where you
had to find the little Waldo somewhere hidden on each page?
Well, the last episode and this one totally reminded me of
not seeing or hearing her AT ALL during the first episode,
I pulled out my detective magnifying glass and combed this
episode for Darrah sightings. Here's one (and quite the surprisingly
sexy one at that). It was just a quick shot as she glanced
over to the others. I'm quite proud that I was able to spot
Show continues as we see him bouncing up and down in the trees
along with brief glimpses of his tidy-whities beneath his
floral skirt. It's easy to see why Big Hairy Man is so popular
when he says things like, "I am loving life and loving
this place and loving the position I'm in. I am in paradise.
What more do I want? I'm living in a bounty of food. I've
got beautiful souls around me. And I've got some help being
was a mellower AARGH! than usual because he was truly appreciating
his paradise. Pirates are not always about pillaging, you
know. They can love life. They can appreciate paradise. They
can flaunt their tidy-whities.)
boy retrieves the Tree Mail (which is actually more like Treasure
Chest mail, which is what I'll call it from now on) and he
shows us that he understands the game pretty well. He knows
that he's the next to go and says that it's do or die for
it was die, unfortunately. During the Reward Challenge, he
had to swim out and dive down in 8- to 10-foot deep water
and retrieve an item off the ocean floor, then put it in a
chest that was difficult to open. He just couldn't do it and
he promptly gave Team Justice League a two man lead.
fairness, Non-Charismatic-Hardly-Noticed Ryan also fell two
people behind, but at least he was able to open the chest
and put his item inside.
is too bad. I believe Skinny Ryan had some mental skills and
some gaming ability that we'll probably never see. Once again,
brawn wins over brains in the beginning stages of the game
and I think this is always a mistake that tribes make. Yes,
some challenges are physical, but usually less than half.
Brains are more important, especially brains that have spent
years of their life in front of the computer playing strategic
it looks good on paper.
in the Reward Challenge was pretty interesting. Two
first clue to a buried treasure chest on their island.
winning tribe also gets to loot one item from the other
tribe's camp - something that will be a part of EVERY
this looting part.
a Little Looting Between Friends Team
Justice League discusses what they should take. They decide
to take the water jug and leave the tarp despite Annoyance
Man's excellent point: "Something to keep in mind, though.
If they have more than one water jug and if all they have
is a tarp, it would be good to hurt them by taking the tarp."
countered, "Honestly, we don't need to hurt them..."
picked Hispanic-Fireball woman to do the looting, while Super-Sweetness
girl made an excellent observation; "No matter who goes,
if you're a nice person or not, if you had another tribe member
come up to your camp and take something of yours, you wouldn't
like them either. I was happy that she went."
Darrah sighting! (The tribe was returning back from the challenge
after their loss. A quick flash. Yet again, no words were
spoken and she tried to blend in with her surroundings, but
I spotted her.)
Idiot says, "He can take ANYTHING except the tarp.
Not the tarp. There is no ifs, ands, or buts about it.
If he takes our tarp, he'll be in trouble. I'm not lying."
Hispanic-Fireball woman took the tarp.
to be nice. She went looking for the water jug, but either
it was hidden or they didn't have one. So she selected the
tarp. Tribe Idiot acted all pissy and Hispanic-Fireball woman
did what she had to do, handling herself the same way she
did as she wheeled-and-dealed in the market.
what happened, "I go to grab a knife and black girl's
like, 'No, no, no you're not going to use our knife and you
better not cut our rope.'
I was like, 'Okay, regardless, I'm taking the tarp down.'
got to like this woman.
I didn't realize how this would play into the strategy of
the game, but now that Team Justice League decided to take
the single most important part of Tribe Idiot's camp, as Jeffy
later put it, "Payback's a bitch." Plus, Hispanic-Fireball
woman could've won a few points with the other tribemembers
had she taken something less important. But now that this
precedence has been set, the looting from here on out will
be no-holds-barred destroy the other camp.
girl FINALLY SPEAKS! I don't remember what she said, but I
DID hear her voice. And this was first and last time so spoke,
so if you missed it then you can thank Goddess for my observant
Man has a Nutty The tip of the fishing spear was lost by one of those
dark-haired-hunkalicious guys (I can't tell them apart --
their bland personalities and hunky looks sort of blend in
to each other, it's kind of like how all those teen and 20-something
rebels who try so hard to go against the norms and be oh-so-unique
end up looking all alike) and Big-Hairy man growled and broke
tree trunks and things. This tip was essential to their food
supply. One would think that the entire tribe would be out
combing the waters in a grid-like pattern. Instead, they seemed
to not care all that much and so Big-Hairy man did it all
a few hours, he actually found the thing, no thanks to his
tribe members. He rejoiced and was happy once again much to
my dismay because I would've liked to have seen Big-Hairy
man drop a treasure chest on One-of-Two-Dark-Haired-Hunkalicious-but-Generally-Non-Existent
man's head while he slept.
they had only one set of goggles, which I'm not sure would
matter. I see people do it on TV, but I was wondering: Does
it hurt to open your eyes in the salty ocean waters? I honestly
was a rather complicated untie knots and drag prisoners and
swim and unbury something and put a flag on a bamboo pole
Idiot had a huge early lead thanks to Prince Andrew, but then
wasn't able to open their clue to the buried treasure and
Idiot tries to decide who should be booted while Wimp-Ass-I-Am-SO-Going-To-Die-From-Pneumonia
asks a few people to vote for him.
Tribe Idiot members explain how it doesn't matter how many
muscles a person has because those won't matter if their heart
is not in the game. Despite this being said even during the
Tribal Council, people still voted to boot Skinny Ryan instead
I said earlier, this is too bad. Skinny Ryan never had a chance.
No one knew him at all. No one bothered to get to know him
to see if he could contribute to the tribe in ways other than
strength. Of course, he's just as much to blame because he
didn't do what it took to present this side of himself.
he will now never, ever forget one of the key strategic moves
to avoid in Survivor:
spend most of your time with the older lady wearing a boy
way, Where's Darrah? was not asked one question during Tribal
Council. Talk about flying under the radar. Not even Jeffy
or the cameras realize she's there.
a minute! I just noticed something peculiar...
a striking resemblance between Skinny Ryan and Waldo.
I don't THINK so!
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